To arrive at a mutual desire to give from the heart, we focus the light of consciousness in fore areas - referred to as the four components of the NBC model.
First, we observe what is actually happening in a situation: what are we observing others saying or doing that is either enriching or not enriching our life? The trick is to be able to articulate this observation without introducing any judgment or evaluation- to simply say what people are doing that we either like or don't like. Next we we state how we feel when we observe this action: are we hurt, scared, joyful, amused, irritated? And, thirdly we say what needs of ours are connected to the feelings we have identified.
An awareness of these three components is peresent when we use NVC to clearly and honestly express how we are.
Four components of nvc:
Observation
Feeling
Needs
Request

[...] thus, part of nvc is to express these four pieces of information very clearly, whether verbally or by other means. The other aspect of this communication consists of receiving the same four pieces of information from others. We connect with them by first sensing what they are observing, feeling, and needing and discover what would enrich their lives by receiving the fourth piece, their request.

Two parts of nvc:
1. Expressing honestly through the four components
2. Receiving empathicly through the four  components.